Ate went to a retreat last week at Caleruega in Tagaytay for her senior year. Three whole days. My heart wanted to break, but this was going to be her last bonding sesh with the people whom she had gotten close to for the last 3 years she was in college. So I stopped myself from crying & put on a brave front so she won’t feel bad leaving her clingy mommy.

As always, she shared her moments with me. She knows how much I worry. Thank you Ate, I really appreciate your thoughtfulness. It’s as if I were there with you & made me miss you a little bit less. Just a teeny tiny bit less..

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Caleruega Retreat Center

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August, 2015

Dearest Ate,

You’re on your 4^th year na. Wow. Time flew by so fast! Maybe because my journey with you guys is always so enjoyable that I just lose track of time. Pretty soon, you’ll be graduating and hopefully, on to Med school. Yay! (or nay??)

I know I always say this to you, and you THINK it’s not true, but you always HAVE A CHOICE. Remember even in high school I told you we will always find a way, you & me, together. You & me, against the world? And ultimately, it’s your decision. Promise. So whatever you decide, wherever you want to go, you will always have my vote. I got your back sweetheart.

This year proves to be a monumental year for you my darling. You’re on your senior year, you’re turning 21, and GREAT THINGS are about to happen to us!!! (fingers crossed) THIS IS IT!! Are you excited? I am. I am so excited to give you things that you & I have only dreamed about. See places we’ve only thought of! And I promise you Ate, it’s just a matter of time, you wait & see.

Even when you were young, all I wanted was to be able to give you the world, anak. Maybe that’s why God didn’t make us so rich haha coz you’d probably be spoiled rotten with the amount of love (a.k.a. material possession) I’d give you. You know me naman, love = spoiling, they go hand in hand.

Loving you is so easy. I know you’re sick & tired of hearing it because I always tell you how blessed I am to have you as my daughter. I look at other kids & I really really am amazed at how much God loves me because He gave me you. You are really the kind of daughter that every mother prays to have.

You are sweet, loving, caring, & thoughtful. You have a good head on your shoulder & you know how to value yourself. I don’t even have to worry about the things other moms worry about because you’ve made parenting so easy for me. And I thank you Ate. Thank you for buying me trinkets all the time. For holding my hand & caring for me so much. For always updating me your whereabouts even though you’re already an adult. (3 straight years going on 4, you have always texted me when you reach your destination just so I don’t worry – suuuper appreciate!) For always studying hard & doing your best, being your best in everything.

Thank you for being my little mommy, the KC to my Sharon (uy, bati na sila!!). For being such a loving Ate to your sibs, especially to our little Nena who absolutely ADORES you & worships the ground you walk on. I am so happy how your relationship has transformed. For being an inspiration to them that they just wanna BE YOU! 😉 While you are super close to your sister, please don’t forget that you also have a brother. He may have changed, but he still needs & loves you. So be patient a little more with him please. Growing pains. 😛

But most of all, thank you for choosing ME to be your mommy. Remember when you were small, I always told you a story how when you were still an angel God asked you to choose your mommy & you chose me? Imperfections & all. I’m such a silly mommy aren’t I? And yet you love me so much anyway. Thank you for making me the most important person in your life.

Know that you have made me very very happy, and felt very very loved. I am so proud of you darling. And I know that you will go far because you have the will, and you have the drive. But also remember that ultimately, only your happiness counts. So only do things that will make you happy. And never allow anyone to treat you less than what you deserve. You are my princess. You have to be treated as such. Never settle for second best, and don’t take crap from anyone.

The time will come that you will find your prince charming. I pray anak that though we can’t teach the heart who to love, you will find someone with Daddy’s GOOD qualities. (Joke, Dad is DABEST!) We are always praying for you, for your right & ideal partner. Someone who will inspire you & love you but also someone who won’t bore you because you are so strong-willed. You need a man, not a boy. If possible, someone with ALL my requirements hehe. (Ang haba ng listahan ko diba)

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Thank you for not rushing in spite of the pressure from well-meaning friends, for not going with the flow & changing boyfriends left & right, for preserving yourself (ay, parang The Mummy naman! Lels). Honestly anak, thank you for keeping yourself pure. Even when the time comes that someone comes along, it will be hard, but give yourself only to the man you will marry. It will matter, believe me.

I love you always & forever. You are my bestest friend. Never forget. And wherever I will go, wherever I may be, you will always have mommy. When you’re sad, all you need to do is close your eyes & listen to your heart. That’s where I will always be.

Love, Mommy

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Ate got a bunch of Palanca letters from her friends through the years. Including ones from her siblings AND miracle of all miracles.. sa tatay nya (which she refuses to let me read, hmp!)

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Thank you Ate for our yummy pasalubong.

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My poor Ate. Masyado yata syang ginutom. Kaya pati Persian Food na hindi naman sya marunong kumain talaga, pinatulan! ;))

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Anyway, what she learned, and is helping me apply..

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Siguro dapat mag-retreat din ako para bumait. HAHAHAHAHA! #HealthyWealthyWise